It’s been a little while since I last posted, but I’m happy to be writing this post. If I’m being honest, I’ve been pretty busy + in a funk. I haven’t had much inspiration to write. I’ve felt that my words have no significance. I’ve been stuck. Typically I’ll have a specific topic for a post + it’ll be full of tips or advice. However, this post is a little different.
This post is not organized + systematic like normal. It doesn’t cover a specific theme or is for a specific audience. If I’m being honest, it’s full of rambling + incomplete thoughts. However, it’s full of truth + what God’s been revealing to me. I hope God can use it + that something will encourage you. I would rather share these thoughts + it be an encouraging mess, rather than keeping it all to myself. Enjoy!
One of the biggest things I’ve noticed about my self is that I am a doer and always push to get stuff done. You can count on me anytime to always complete a project or get a task completed. However, with that comes living based off productivity and accomplishments, as well as prioritizing tasks over people.
In this season of life, I have been wanting to be a doer for God and by that, I mean I have had a huge drive to do things for God + to be used by Him, like the people in the Bible. I want to see miracles, to have cool stories + to be a disciple. It discourages me even more when I see people around me doing so much: running their own businesses for God, preaching for God, fulfilling their purpose and bringing so many people to God. I want to do that.
Not that these things are bad at all, however, for me it has come out of some of the wrong motives: to show I am a believer, to show that I am enough + that I have purpose. Maybe you’re in the same place too. Trying to live life for God but with the wrong purpose. Our good intentions + desires can often get tainted by selfish desires. We may not even recognize it, but it is necessary to take a step back to evaluate what our motives actually are when serving God.
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There’s so much wrapped around purpose and plans– I feel it’s all believers ever talk and think about. But what if we focused less on what we’re doing + how much were doing and focused more on who were doing it for + what our ultimate motive is. What if we focused more on our relationship with God, rather than all the things we do for Him. Ultimately that is what matters + what will bring the most satisfaction.
God has brought it to my attention that I have been finding my identity in what I do, rather than who defines me + whose I am. While doing stuff for God is great, if it is not the right stuff or what I’m called to, then it is actually a waste of time and counterproductive. It’s not about how much we get done for God, especially when compared to other people. Rather, sitting in His presence + spending time with Him is should be enough (and is productive).
You see, God didn’t create us to just be doers. Although He has given us jobs and commands, it isn’t just about what we do or don’t do. God created us first most for relationship with Him. He loved us + chose us– not based on anything we could do or ever would do. He created us + died on the cross knowing that what we do would not be enough. It was never about us in the first place + it never will be. So our responsibilities + what we do here on Earth are a reflection of God + His character. God was kind enough to give us a purpose + things to do for Him to grow His kingdom. But it’s not what we do that defines us.
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In this, we have to redefine what productivity and accomplishments are: because most of our motivation is influenced by the world, not godly desires. Our world prioritizes success, independence + self-sufficiency. We can get caught up with one foot in the world + one foot trying to honor God… but we will come to a point when we can’t do both. You are either following one or the other.
The things that are productive in the kingdom of God may actually seem quite unproductive + foolish by the world’s standards. When you think about it, giving away your money, having faith + being willing to lose for others are all things that would put us behind in American culture. But if we are truly living for Christ + success in His kingdom, then we are willing to look unproductive in the world’s eyes.
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God gives us all different talents + gifts. Think of the Parable of the Talents in Matthew 25:14–30. God cares more about what we do with what we’ve been given, rather than how much we do, especially when compared to others. He wants to see us be faithful in what He has given us, then He may choose to bless us more. In the end, comparing yourself to others doesn’t help because you don’t see the big picture + you were not created to be them.
Secondly, you can’t be living by the world standards of productivity when you’re living for a heavenly impact. We get to choose to serve God or serve the world + within that is the standards we live by. Our productivity and accomplishments are either defined by God or defined by the world, each with different things that are prioritized.
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So if you are a doer like me, struggling with comparing yourself to others, wanting to do more for God, wanting to be a part of stuff that is meaningful, chase after God. Set your sights on Him. Let Him be your standard. Let Him define who you are + what you do. Don’t get so caught up in how much you’re doing, especially if it’s for an earthy impact or something you won’t remember in a few years. God wants to use you, it just may be in a different way or a different time than you expect. Remain open to Him + stay connected to Him + you will find your purpose.
Thanks for reading my rambling! I hope that God uses it + that it could encourage you 🙂
<3 Ainsley